Madonna's rider goes "down the tubes"!

Smiley Roberts · Post by **Smiley Roberts** » 31 Jul 2006 5:33 am

Check out this rider request in Madonna's contract. If ya ask me,it stinks

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Madonna Flush with Success

There are privileges to being a pop icon that go far beyond mere fame and fortune. For instance, you always have a pristine place to park your keister whenever nature calls. That's a germ-free perk enjoyed by Madonna, who requires a brand spankin' new toilet seat at every stop of her mega-grossing "Confessions" tour, according to the New York Daily News.

"It must be wrapped in plastic so her people can open it, and then she demands it be disposed of immediately after she leaves the venue so no one can sell it on eBay," a mole tattles to the paper.

Madonna's rep vouches for the unsullied seat demand, and disturbingly adds, "I don't know if anyone helps her wipe, but there are probably people who would volunteer."

The sanitized toilet isn't the Big M's only request on the road. The London Mirror helpfully details some of her other backstage wants: three Kabbalah candles, including one that, like her ever-present red string bracelet, wards off the evil eye (presumably coming from the guy who has to install and dispose of her toilet seat); pricey Kabbalah water; dozens of white roses; unsalted edamame; a foot spa; and yards of white fabric to drape her dressing room.
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(this,probably,should've been placed in "Humor"!)

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<pre> ~ ~
©¿© It don't mean a thang,
mm if it ain't got that twang.</pre>

Steve Pacholl · Post by **Steve Pacholl** » 31 Jul 2006 5:45 am

The Smokinggun.com site has several artist's contracts and riders. Since they make Smoking Gun, you can expect them to have some odd requests.

David L. Donald · Post by **David L. Donald** » 31 Jul 2006 8:50 am

unsalted edamame...
hmmm, so who takes the time to take
the sea salt out of the seaweed?

Riders are also used by artists to keep their promoters and management honest and/or sharp.

There have been MANY dodgy promoters paying for a big name,
but also paying squat for the show production values.

Making the artist look BAD...
"Gee XXXX sucked tonight..."
Of course the punter doesn't know that
the cheezewhiz monitor system blew up in the 3rd song..
they don't care.

Such was the infamous rider of ;
3 lbs of M'n'M's in a bowl in the dressing room ,
BUT "No Red M'n'M's or we don't play."

This was specificly to make sure
the venue WAS looking at details like
working PA, and lighting, etc.

If they sweat the M'n'M's,
then everything else will likely be working right.[This message was edited by David L. Donald on 01 August 2006 at 09:50 AM.]

Mike Perlowin RIP · Post by **Mike Perlowin RIP** » 31 Jul 2006 9:54 am

..she demands it be disposed of immediately after she leaves the venue so no one can sell it on eBay,

Darn. Now my life will never be complete.

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Warning: I have a telecaster and I'm not afraid to use it.
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My web site

Pete Burak · Post by **Pete Burak** » 31 Jul 2006 11:05 am

Mike, I think you can still get Garcia's toilet seat, if that's any, uhhh... constellation?!?!

Smiley Roberts · Post by **Smiley Roberts** » 31 Jul 2006 11:10 am

...if that's any, uhhh... constellation?!?!

Does that mean its out of this world??

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<pre> ~ ~
©¿© It don't mean a thang,
mm if it ain't got that twang.</pre>

Mike Shefrin · Post by **Mike Shefrin** » 31 Jul 2006 12:49 pm

I'm really pissed off because someone outbid me on Ebay for a vial of sweat from singer Tom Jones. Sold for fifty thousand.[This message was edited by Mike Shefrin on 31 July 2006 at 01:51 PM.]

David L. Donald · Post by **David L. Donald** » 1 Aug 2006 8:52 am

I think that was just Smiley,
tryin' to get an old pair back.

Colm Chomicky · Post by **Colm Chomicky** » 1 Aug 2006 9:31 am

yards of white fabric to drape her dressing room.

Obviously related to the toilet seat.

Donny Hinson · Post by **Donny Hinson** » 1 Aug 2006 1:12 pm

I can just see it now...

She has a special armored truck follow her around the country, and that truck carts her "disposed seats" to a secure facility where the employees burn some new seats, and stash the "used" ones for later sale on ebay.

Madonna's getting a little "long in the tooth" to be a sex symbol. I mean, it's not like she was ever that hot anyway (compared to Barbara Niven

)

Makeup does wonders to plain faces!