Tony Oresteen
From:
Georgia, USA
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Posted 29 May 2017 10:14 am |
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Rules For Visiting Questionable Honky Tonks & Houses of Ill Repute:
1. Make sure you have cleared your lower digestive track at least 2 hours prior to departure.
2. Leave all valuables at home - rings, wallets, CC, etc.
3. Take only enough cash for the night (no bill large than a $10), driver's license (preferably a good fake with an alias), & cell phone. No CC. Keep cash split up in multiple pockets.
4. Make sure you have your bail bondsman's number in your phone.
5. Never go alone. Always bring a big healthy friend.
6. Always look for a secondary exit from the establishment.
7. Always sit with your back to a wall. Try to be 3 steps from the door.
8. Drink only domestic bottled beer with a twist off cap and order it with the cap on. Order two at a time; keep one as a field expedient hand grenade.
9. Always depart early - well before the encore.
10. Never, ever let anyone take pictures of yourself in the establishment. Ditto for selfies.
11. Staff whose name tags read "Angel", "Sapphire", "Brandy", "Lola","Candy", or "Bambi" most likely have a different name on their birth certificate.
12. Upon departure always make a phone call from a nearby church.
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Tony
Newnan, GA
Too many guitars, not enough time to play
'72 Sho-Bud 6139, '71 Marlen 210
'78 Fender Stringmaster T8 black
PedalMaster D8 |
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